From New York: Honeymooners get the red carpet treatment ... it's the TOP TEN LIST for Tuesday, August 1, 1995. And now, your TV swami ... David Letterman!
10. Andy Rooney is now dishwasher safe
9. My first question for each guest will be, "so, tell me about
your appliances?"
8. CBS executives replaced by whole new batch of weasels
7. CBS News to add a spin cycle
6. Thanks to advanced refrigerator technology, Ed Sullivan
Theater will dip down to 4 below zero
5. "Late Show" replaced by hour-long shot of a washing machine
4. "60 Minutes" doing a lot more investigations of that Maytag
outfit
3. I get to use slightly-rewritten G.E. jokes from the late 80's
2. Dan Rather's new co-anchor: a coffee pot
1. Five words: "Dr. Quinn, Refrigerator Repair Woman"
[Music: "Can't Buy Me Love" by John Lennon and Paul McCartney]
© Copyright Worldwide Pants, Incorporated. All Rights Reserved